Grá? (Love?)

Violets are purenz bloo,
Nd Roses, dey are like reli red,
Lol itz nawt valetimes, but sure,
Can i still get head?

A man came onto a bus wearing his pyjama's.
It was perfectly acceptable. He got off at his preferred destination and went on with his life.

Girls like a chase. They don't like getting raped in a forest though.
Make up your minds! Always starting, never finishing.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Albert_Fish


Here's a man who cut the bullshit. I suggest you educate yourself on the man.

Here's a quote out of a letter he sent to a young girl's mother;

"I choked her to death, then cut her in small pieces so I could take my meat to my rooms. Cook and eat it. How sweet and tender her little ass was roasted in the oven. It took me 9 days to eat her entire body. I did not fuck her tho [sic] I could of had I wished. She died a virgin."

How comforted she must have felt to know he didn't rape her.

The moral of the story is. Be a bit more direct towards men, and maybe, just maybe, you wont get tortured, raped and eaten.

He also liked boys. Here's a lesson in cooking:

"I made a stew out of his ears – nose – pieces of his face and belly. I put onions, carrots, turnips, celery, salt and pepper. It was good. Then I split the cheeks of his behind open, cut off his monkey and pee wees and washed them first. I put strips of bacon on each cheek of his behind and put them in the oven."

His nickname as a child was "Ham and Eggs".

Moving on.


Joseph Fritzl. D.I.Y King.

There's a man who can build.
I can just about put up a level shelf. He built a dungeon under his house in under 2years.

Don't let the bags under the eyes fool you. He stores wall filler in there.

Think what you will about the man, but look at that.













He should have been sentenced to a lifetime of building extensions.


To surmise this blog; Love is a strange thing. If you don't want someones love, remember to give it back. Then run for the hills.

My Thirst

Why is there an apple
Inside my bag?
But wait!
It's a peach.
I placed it there this morning.
With haste,
But not waste,
I placed it in my mouth.

The taste,
It erased,
The flavour coming first,
My thirst.

F is the most sensitive button on my keyboard

So I apologise if I'm tempted to swear frequently. Of such matters as foreigners, France, french foreigners and fornication.

That person in the distance. One moment they're someone you've known all your life.
The next, they're just an acquaintance.
Now you're face to face. You've never seen them in your life.

Autumn is a more poignant time for night. Nature nears death, but seems to be more conspicuous.
It's similar to someone who just had their torso torn open and their intestines are spilling everywhere. Maybe a bit more sentimental. I suppose you could throw some ribbons around their lungs and liver. Liven up the image a bit.

Walking through an imbroglio of snails. Landmines below my feet. A loss of a life every time. Unintentional.
"There's too many of them anyways".
I bet you would justify yourself with that too, you Nazi bastard.


This is a reading from the letter of St. Paul to the Romans;

Wel bois, wat yeh up tah? pure bord ere lol

wb

---------------------------------------------------------------

Hello, I'm Jessica.
I am a stewardess. Days working like crazy and nights Alone in a Hotel room
I would like to meet someone for intimate encounters.

This week, I will be in different cities of US... New York, Sligo, Los Angeles, Miami ...

I also travel to: UK & Canada next month

I am looking for an ongoing sexual relationship only with No Engagement!!!!

All the big cities of the U.S, and now Sligo. Why?!
But it does sound very promising.


Some nights when I'm out,
I wonder.
Which pint glass did I leave my standards at the bottom of?

I also wonder. Could I jump down the full flight of stairs and crawl to the urinal quicker than stumbling down each step, avoiding sick and crying girls.

The answer to all these questions is bound to be at the bottom of another glass.



So smash it off a table and jam it into your neck, you mess.














U tawk funi wit ur wurdz :S

1 New Message

Hi, I'm Michael Finn, and I'd like to sodomise your mum.

I wrote a rant about big brother that's too long for a status, so fancy publishing it on your blog? Cheers.

Is actually pissed off with Channel 4's decision to have a fucking ''Ultimate Big Brother'''! Aimed towards the fucking retards that don't even know what 'Big Brother' is supposed to mean, but somehow feel a connection with the attention whores clustered into a house together! I thought Channel 4 had standards, but they seem to lack imagination, and want to give twats fame for no specific reason, or airspace to an Asian poof, that has a thing for saggy women.You could tell me not to watch it, but if it's not the 12 hours of airspace it takes up, it's gonna be another shitfest like X Factor, just on time to have a bollocks cover song (which every chav will realise he/she loves, and will play it on their phones, ignorant to the fact that it's a cover) with a key change at the end and a montage of the 'X Factor journey' in a radio friendly, Christmas music video! But we must feel sympathy for their sob stories, as having a dead mum or a recovering drug problem makes you, somehow, a good singer.

In conclusion, it took Jade Goody three Big Brothers to get evicted from life, hope the trend continues, :).

There you go, you shite monger. I'm not making a habit of posting peoples rants. So if you want a piece of my exposure, you can fuck right off.
Double plus good!

Shattered

August has been a scattered month. Whataya gonna do?!

If your body is a temple, then mine is a slum.

Thinking you've eaten all your toast and turning around to find a corner of toast sitting on the arm-rest. That is quite enjoyable.

Getting mistaken for another cat by a... yeh... because you have rattling coins in your pocket is awful daft. Every time you look behind you, there it is, looking around as if you didn't know.
Sure don't we all.

My raggedy ass clothes have exposed me once again.

I may be unhealthy, but I certainly don't look it!

Look at you. Driving your own extensions of your greed.

The big problem with thinking too fast is that you can't keep at the same pace speaking, so you slur your words. Your brain will go at such a speed that it'll trip over your mouth, leaving you with an overbite. That pretty much hinders you even further. Maybe even your forehead will melt over your face in a fury of linguistic improbabilities.
Typing is a different story. I've never tripped over my own fingers. I suppose I could grab my feet and hop down the stairs.
That's likely to happen in a world where my mind moves slower than my digestive system.
Or in a house where I'm given free alcohol.

Gladly appreciated if you could oblige me to that.

As I've said before, I love making paragraphs. It keeps me happy, and it stops your attention from fading. I start losing the point and you~

Jump ahead. Wonderful!

Tick. Tock.
Tick. Tock.
Every tick.
Every tock.
One more second.
One more second awake.
Time passes,
And you wait.
Every second,
And you hear it.
"Lets count time together"; Says the clock.
"Lets hide you from the night"; Says the lock.
Inside, and behind your door.
Start drinking coffee, 'cause you'll sleep no more.
The tick and the tock from every little clock.
The watch keeping rhyme,
Keeping you awake all the time.
In a time where patience and rest comes to play,
Ticking in the night. The world sleeps until day.

What time did you go to sleep?
I don't know. I was meant to check the time as soon as I fell asleep.

For something interesting: http://uk.news.yahoo.com/5/20100824/tod-the-pizza-burger-a-2-500-calorie-fat-870a197.html

Get it into yeh!

fhjkhulj

Aint Nathin' Purtier than coffee stained mug.
The Stain is in the shape of Majorca.

I think it's a sign.

A sign that you're a bollocks.

If you fail to draw sense from that statement, it's likely that you fail at other things too.


You're awful silly.

I feel slightly braindamaged at the moment, so it may take several days to proof read this. If you're as dozy as me(you're more than likely worse), I'll prob have it sorted by the time you get around to reading this.
I've decided to eat more. And to do the majority of it before bed. It's good craic. The disgust of passers-by to find a sleeping fat prick with a pizza slice on his face...wonderful.
I don't think I'll be able to combat the gain of weight. I'll probably just do a few jumping jacks and wear bigger clothes so it feels like I'm becoming incredibly skinny.

Ah I couldn't even be arsed anymore. Enjoy your shallow lives.

The Glass Is Half Ignorant

I was topping and tailing berries. Sorting them from one bucket to another in which will go towards making jam. They both came to roughly half way, and I thought, as I was mumbling and moaning as per usual; Am I an optimist or a pessimist?
I noticed in one bucket, which was slightly more than half way up (half full), there was a little spider crawling over the berries. How happy he must have been. All the food he could ever desire surrounding him. Such a nice thought. Every thing's surely looking up for him. He picked the half full bucket and he's sorted.
So I thought from then. I too should be optimistic. In doing so, I will prosper in this world. Happy as can be. So I'm changing my style of writing and my outlook on the world.

Thanks Mr.Spider. I really owe you one :)
This has brought me to a great conclusion.









If you call me a pessimist, I'll boil you in jam.

Fuck off.